I believe in boundaries because, for a long time, I didn’t have any.
The result? I got very sick.
Eight years ago, I was diagnosed with cancer. The tests showed it wasn’t genetic – it was environmental.
So yes, I believe deeply in having boundaries.
- Saying no to things that don’t serve me
- Being mindful of what I eat and drink
- Moving my body intentionally every day
- Investing in myself – with both time and money
But here’s the rub.
In my own life, and in my work as a coach and recruiter, I’ve noticed something: sometimes we set “boundaries” not out of necessity – but out of fear.
These so-called boundaries – the ones we tell ourselves are protecting our mental or physical health – can quietly become obstacles. They hold us back from moving forward.
This is especially true when life is good. We convince ourselves there’s no need to change anything. But living fully requires adjusting, tweaking, and growing.
Too often, we avoid risk under the guise of “setting boundaries,” when what we’re really doing is avoiding discomfort.
For example:
- Dating again after a long-term relationship or marriage
- Leaving a job for a better opportunity
- Networking to grow a business or career
- Going to the gym because we worry what others might think
- Showing up on video to market ourselves (yes – hand raised)
And the list goes on.
So, the next time you feel anxious or stuck, pause.
The answer may not be doing less or building more walls.
Instead, ask yourself:
What am I avoiding?
What could I change or adjust right now?
Because sometimes, growth isn’t on the other side of protection.
It’s on the other side of courage.
QUOTE OF THE WEEK
“To live a full, happy and healthy life, is to live life not in deprivation, but in joy.”
Emy Fernandez, MBA, Certified Life Coach
