Entering and Exiting

Coral Gables Counseling Center - Wednesday, January 01, 2020
By Emy Fernandez, MBA, Life Coach

Life and Wellness Coach

At the end of every year, I plan and prepare for entering and exiting my liminal space. This year, I’ve been honoring my own liminal space since December 26, 2019. And, although today is the first day of the year, I’ll be continuing in this reflective, transitional state until January 5, 2020. I do continue doing some work and participating in end of year get togethers with family and friends, but I focus on being alone as much as possible during my liminal space.

During my liminal space I pause to reflect on 2019 both at a personal and business level. And, although I’ve been making my 2020 business and personal plans during the month of December, I hold off finalizing my plans for 2020 until January 6 when I’m outside my liminal space and can see clearly.

Entering and exiting the liminal space, is a structured process, but there are no set rules on setting your transitional state or state of liminality. It’s very personal.

The following are my rules or structure:

Pre liminal stage (unfreeze) – I pause to reflect on 2019. My wins, my losses.

Liminal stage (change) – I analyze the wins worth repeating in the New Year. And I analyze my losses or fails. What can be tweaked and what I need to put behind me. This is a hard time for me. Especially if my fails or losses are more than my wins. But, although hard, it’s a time for me to learn from my fails, knowing there is an eventual end. It gives me a chance to open and create space for new opportunities instead of being burdened with the old.

Post liminal stage (refreezing) – Exiting my liminal stage. My plans and changes begin internalizing and taking shape. Acceptance of the changes. Celebration of the New Year as a second chance. If you want to make a major change – the more difficult the liminal change the bigger the change and sometimes higher the return.

Although some stay in the liminal stage, I like to exit it and re enter it when I need to incorporate a major change.

During the last couple of years when I was diagnosed with cancer in 2017, I was in a pre liminal stage during diagnoses, I was in liminal stage during my surgery and chemotherapy and I entered the post liminal stage during my recovery after the surgery and chemotherapy. This liminal space lasted two years.

So, while my end of year liminal space lasts just a couple of weeks, the liminal space I was in from the time of my diagnoses to recovery, was two years.

As we close 2019, regardless of where you’re at in your liminal space, remember to take some time to pause and find your quiet space, to breathe and embrace the New Year with anticipation for the new opportunities in store for you.

Our team at Coral Gables Counseling Center and I wish you all a wonderful New Year! And we want to thank you, our readers, for allowing us in your in box every week. This is a privilege we don’t take lightly.

OVER TO YOU:
Do you enter a liminal space in order to move from the old to the new?
If so, what process do you use?
If you don’t, what can you do in 2020 to change this?
Leave your comments here.