The other day I was really looking at myself in the mirror while I was getting dressed. I was looking at my body and scars and, I had this overwhelming feeling like never before. I felt out of breath. It was an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for it. Even now, as I am writing this, I have the same feeling just in the recollection of it.
I do not recall ever feeling grateful for this body. My younger self has always been fighting with it. I always felt too tall, too big, too slow, and too awkward. I always felt my hair was too curly and too frizzy. I always felt my cheeks were too big, my eyebrows were too hairy and, my lashes too long. I look at pictures now and, I remember what I was feeling and thinking when they were taken. I remember the unhappiness.
Yet, as the Emy of today stood staring back at my 62-year-old reflection. I felt bad for my younger self for not knowing how to appreciate her body and the person she was. It was always such a struggle.
The Emy of today only feels gratefulness and appreciation for who I am. I appreciate everything this body has battled and recovered from and is still going strong.
This body,
has carried, delivered, and nursed three kids;
has recovered from multiple weight gains and losses;
has undergone numerous surgeries; and
has undergone chemotherapy.
Today, I love myself and my body first. I invest in playing tennis, working out with a personal trainer, and eating well. In addition to investing in my physical growth, I invest in my personal and emotional development by nourishing my mind and thoughts. And, I thank it at the end of the day before I go to bed and again when I wake up.
Thank you for having the strength and stamina to produce, deliver and nurture my children.
Thank you for restoring yourself after the multiple diets I’ve been on.
Thank you for getting me back on my feet quickly after the numerous surgeries.
Thank you for responding well to the chemotherapy and surviving breast cancer so that I can continue enjoying my life, my family, my friends, and my best friend – me!
QUOTE FOR THE WEEK
“And I said to my body softly, ‘I want to be your friend.’ It took a long breath and replied, ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.” — Nayyirah Waheed
