Mom You Did the Best You Could

Coral Gables Counseling Center - Monday, July 24, 2023
By Emy Fernandez, MBA, Life Coach

The other day my sister and I were spending time with our adult daughters relaxing and hanging out in the pool.  They were talking about growing up with us and one of my daughters said:

“Mom you did the best you could.”

picture of Emy with family

It was interesting. When I heard it, I thought – Oh OK.  So not good or great – not bad or awful – but “…the best you could.”  Honestly, my reaction was confusion.  I didn’t know how to react to it.

So, I didn’t “react” to it.

Instead, I asked her what she meant.  When she told me – I had a lot of thoughts about it.  I tried to explain the reason for my actions – but I stopped and just said “OK.”

It wasn’t OK though.  I kept thinking how I could have done it differently so her experience would have been instead “Mom you were great.”

Two days later my brain was still ruffling through my memories and wondering if I could have done anything different.

My answer was – “No.”

The reason I know this for sure is because when I was raising my kids my decisions relative to them were always very purposeful and intentional.  They were thought out and I always, always had a reason behind my decisions with the information and tools I had at that time.  All action I took for them was out of love and for their own good and never in disregard of them.

There’s nothing I would have done differently when it came to them.

So yes – she’s right – I did the “best I could.”  And, I’m happy with that.

Quote of the Week

“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow,
You have to be in their lives today.” Barbara Johnson

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